Notes from a Mother

Ever had one of those days that just won’t end? That would be today for me. Some days I feel like I don’t stop long enough to take a breath, but I look around and it appears (to the untrained eye) that I haven’t done a thing.

I feel like a fire fighter, constantly putting out pop-ups. As soon as you get one little brush fire doused, three more pop-up. It’s exhausting.

I’m sure the neighbors hate me. Afterall, my back yard looks like it could or should be featured on Jeff Foxworthy’s Redneck Yard of the Week. My children actually overturned a trash can and proceeded to climb in it today. How disgusting is that? I was threatening to hose them off in the back yard before bringing them into the house for a shower but I couldn’t find the key to the storage building where the hose is kept. I made them scrub extra good…the thought of touching the trash can gives me the total creeps. And yet there they were, at 11 am, taking a break from school outside, crawling into the trash can. Whose kids are those anyway?

Oh and then there was the afternoon escapade. Grey loves loves loves to run full tilt across our back yard and hit the swing with his arms outstretched, on his chest/belly. It’s positively hilarious to watch. He does it with such confidence, which I guess is to be expected, since he’s done it about a million times. Hits the swing and his running momentum pushes it up off the ground and his little body flies up into the air and every single time he laughs just like it was his very first time. It’s delightful to watch. It’s why I wanted a house.

But today…today was different. For some reason he needed something different to do today. Have you ever tried the flying leap while naked? I came into the kitchen and looked out the big window just in time to see this tiny little un-tanned touché flying up into the air on the swing. Julian’s practically rolling around in the dirt laughing…I hit the door in time to hear Grey laughing out loud, just like always. I knew better than to scold. I wouldn’t have been able to keep a straight face anyway. Sometimes you just have to laugh at the little buggers. When I got to the swing, G smiled up at me and said “me nekkid bood-ie”. Ya think. The whole world is getting a view of your little back side boy. I’m sure the neighbors are thrilled.

Later on, we went to the grocery to get the stuff to make roasted chicken and veggies. They both behaved so well in the grocery. We made it all the way to the check out without incident. But alas, today was one of those days. We get into the check out line behind someone with a large order. Another shopper pulls into the lane behind us. While we are waiting, Julian looks suspiciously at the white plastic covers that the store places in front of the magazines that are fronted by nearly-naked women. (This is one of the reasons I shop at this particular store.) Ever the curious sort, J can’t stand not knowing what’s behind the shields. So, before I can say don’t, he peaks. And gets an eyeful.

His hand flies to his mouth and he covers it to stifle the giggles. I glare at him. Praying. Please…no comments…just be quiet.

But no. I couldn’t be that lucky.

“Mom, she’s nee----kid.” he says, his voice a hair shy of 3 billion decibels.

I hear the woman behind me snort.

“I know Julian. That’s why the cover is there.”

“She needs to get some clothes on. Her bra is showing.”

“Ok Julian. Here…why don’t you hold this while I unload the cart.” I hand him a brick of cheese.

Does it never end? I wasn’t aware he knew what a bra was.

We came home. I was slicing onion, carrots and celery for the roast chicken. Grey asks for a piece of celery. I give him an end piece with the frilly part on it to fool with while I’m chopping and washing the usable parts. Suddenly I hear these pings from about 4 different spots in the kitchen. I look at him and he’s got that grin again. The one that says “Me?...Noooo.”

Sure enough…he flicked the piece of celery up into the ceiling fan and it got chopped into about 4 pieces and flung around the kitchen. Bugger. So then of course, he wants another piece. “I don’t think so, you little stinker.”

In the end the roasted chicken and veggies was delicious, the floor has been vacuumed for the third and final time today and they are *finally* in bed. I never even touched the laundry today…that’ll just have to wait till tomorrow.

My passport came in the mail today. That’s exciting. Joal’s came on Saturday. Now we are set for world-wide adventures!

Happy Tuesday!!