For Immediate Release
Sherwin Williams paint company has announced today that it is teaming up with Whitehall-Robins Healthcare (the makers of Robitussin Cough Syrups) to create a new line of paint and home décor products. This new line of paint and products for the home will be available in the fashionable yet somewhat mild shade of pink…the same shade of the famous Robitussin products.
“We have conducted extensive market research and have found that our soothing pink cough syrup color is just what the doctor ordered for sparking up boring white kitchen décor. This new concept in decorating began with a young painter in Nashville, Tennessee. It was reported recently that he received great enjoyment when he used our actual cough syrup to paint his mothers kitchen. This young man is leading us to an un-tapped market and a new use for our products.”
When asked why he chose to paint a large section of the kitchen cabinets with cough syrup the little Nashvillian, a short man of few words, said simply “Stick--y.” Then he laughed heartily.
A Whitehall-Robins spokeswoman noted that one of the major selling points of the new cough syrup paint product is not only its pink color but also its poignant smell and water-resistance. “It also traps flys and dust.” she noted.
It’s not clear at this time when cough syrup paint will be available locally.
The above is purely fiction. Sometimes writing fiction can be a way to cope with crazyness and imagine that there’s usefulness in the irritations of life.
PS Well, OK, it's not totally fictional. It's based in truth. G painted my cabinets with a bottle of Robitussin this morning. I can attest to the flies and dust comment. And the smell really clears the nasal passages.