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He was fairly happy...I promise.



A couple of the many cards Andy has received over the past few weeks...these two from a homeschool group in Texas. Thank you to everyone who has sent cards, gifts, and letters.

And now for the story about the police officer...no I wasn't arrested or anything fun like that.

My flight out on Sunday morning was pretty early so I wanted to get as much done on Saturday night as I could. I did some laundry for Andy, made the aforementioned spaghetti, and picked up extra Sunny D on Saturday evening. Around 9:30pm I decided to make one more trip over to his room to deliver some of the stuff I needed to take him, so I would have such a large number of things to carry on Sunday morning. Thinking ahead is not my forte, but I was trying to make Sunday morning go as smooth as possible.

So I trek over to the unit entrance with my arms loaded down.
It's not a long walk necessarily.
Maybe the length of 2 football fields.
I don't know exactly.
It's far enough to be annoying if you forget something and have to go back...

Or if you walk over with your arms loaded down, only to discover that the doors are locked.
Which is what happened to me.

So I was frustrated.
I had told Andy I would come back and say goodnight and deliver the stuff...
Not anticipating that the entrance would be locked.

So I set the stuff down on a bench by the doors for a minute, to mutter a few choice words and re-load the items I was now going to have to carry back with me.

And then a police officer appeared at the doors (big glass sliding doors), opened one of them manually and asked if I needed something. "I just needed to deliver this stuff to my brother in the SCID unit if that's possible. I'm leaving tomorrow and was hoping to get as much done tonight as possible."

"Come on in" he said "I'll walk you down there."

I was so grateful and I told him so.
How easy it would have been for him to stay seated at his security desk and not bother with me.

So we walked down that long silent coridoor. He asked about my brother...and I gave him the short version. We got to Andy's door and I went in and did what I needed to do. As it turns out Andy was still awake, so I got to say "goodnight" and make sure his drink was within reach. I could tell he was pretty settled in for resting, but I think it helped us both to be able to close the day together.

I went back out to find my escort waiting at the nurses station. We walked back down the long hallway, talking about all sorts of things. I found out that this time last year he was finishing his third tour as a soldier in Iraq. He had an injury that forced him into retirement. Now he's a Tampa Police officer.

He let me out and I thanked him again.
His kindness was indeed a special part of my day.

It's the little things...ya know.

Happy Monday.

Roller...as in Roller Coaster!

Saturday night in Tampa...what a crazy day. Y esterday was kindof a booger of a day--it started extremely early with a trip to the airport to deliver Daniel and it never stopped. If you know me at all, you know that I n-e-v-e-r go to bed before midnight (trully never). Last night I was snoozing by 9:50 and I overslept a bit this morning. This place is an emotional vacuum.

When I am with Andy, I get this wierd sort of tunnel vision. Life outside comes to a grinding halt and I have to consult my phone to even remember the date and time. Days run together and nights aren't long enough. There are so many moments that I long to share but I can't take the time to write it all out tonight--I have to sleep to fly tomorrow without getting cranky so I'm only writing one story for tonight.

Andy had a downer of a day today. His doctors are monkeying with his pain meds and he's not getting good relief, so as one might expect, he was kindof a bear today. I tried everything I could think of that might be of service, but it just wasn't ment to be. By the end of the day--around 4 pm, I needed to pick up some grocery things for Daniel (I have a car) so I left to run my little errands and get some dinner. I came back around 5:30 pm to check on him and he was sitting up in the bed scowling at the dinner tray that had just been delivered. It was not a pretty sight--the tray or the face.

He looked so bummed. "How can I get stronger on food like this?" he asked me and I had to agree it was pretty pathetic. Mashed fake potatoes, faded green beans, unidentifyable soup, orange juice, and something called "Minced Beef".

Let me tell you.
Minced beef is 100 times worse than it sounds.
And it sounds horrible.
Think pre-chewed meatloaf...kinda shaped like rice kernals.
And brown.
Formed in the shape of the scoop it was applied to the plate with.

Now that's some healing goodness right there.
NOT!
I took one look at that and wanted to cry for him. And I looked at him and he looked at me...and I knew we had to do something.
Fast.

So, Andy says "Do you suppose you could loan me $20?"
"Of course, what do you want to buy?"
"I wanna order a pizza."

"Alrighty then."
And for the first time today, Andy seemed a little more like Andy...and a little happy.
And I could feel the breeze on the mountaintop!!

So, we rounded up the location of the nearest pizza joint and I told him that I had been considering making a pot of spaghetti and meat sauce to leave for Daniel...I asked if that sounded good to him.

He rolled his eyes...and said "Aww Sarah".
It was a declaration of love, I tell ya.
So we made a plan.
I had to hit a grocery for the supplies for spaghetti and I would pick up the pizza while I was out. Somehow, before I got out the door he requested Sprite and Blue Bell Cookie n Cream Ice Cream as well. I've have never been so over-joyed to go to the grocery in my life!

He said: "Man. I'm really hungry now. I haven't wanted to eat in ages."
You had better believe that I flew...like a rocket to the grocery and the pizza place. By this time I would have gone to the moon to fulfill any request he made. It felt so good to be useful and to know that he was finally interested in eating.

It took me a little over an hour to get it all together and he ate...willingly and hungrily. And it was a beautiful sight. He ate some pizza and some ice cream...ok...alot of ice cream. Deb..I told him about "personal pints" and he smiled that beautiful smile. That boy deserves "glorious gallons"...yes.

We talked for a bit after dinner...he was more like himself than I have seen to date--and it was a complete gift. I asked him if I could take his picture and he said OK. (He had said no to my earlier attempt.) I posted it to Facebook...I considered taking out an ad in the New York Times ...

After eating, and our conversation, he was pretty worn out, so I told him I needed to get moving on the spaghetti prep for tomorrow. I was planning to put his pizza in the refrigerator when he stopped me and said "Leave 2 slices here for a midnight snack." So I wrapped up a plate and left it within reach. OK...he really was hungry. :)

I went back to the Fisher House where I am bunking and prepared the spaghetti and meat sauce. The Fisher House is a housing facility for family members of patients at the VA units. It's like a small hotel, with a large communal kitchen, living room with tv and dining room. It's a wonderful place...and only a few steps from the rehab entrance...so it's wonderfully convenient. (More on that later.)

I began to prepare the pasta and the sauce and some other family members were eating and talking in the kitchen area. A lady come in and asked if anyone knew who offers takeout in this neighborhood. It's getting on kinda late and it occured to me that takeout would take a while and she shared that she had just arrived late last night and had no sleep for 36 hours and was starving...her son is 20 and was 173rd Airborne wounded in Afghanistan. "I'm making some pasta and sauce...I'm happy to share" I said.

So we ate together (I had a salad from earlier) and shared some stories. I'm so glad to have had the chance to be in that room at the right time making a simple dinner--ostensibly for Daniel and Andy--but also for her. She later said "I haven't had a home cooked meal in 3 months."

Two nights ago I was the new girl, wandering, feeling overwhelmed and useless--tonight, I feel like a million bucks...Andy's eating and I shared a meal with an amazing mom who has given up everything to care for her son. Oh how good our God is...when we are in the valley, he gives us a way up, if we can only see it.

I want to be that person more often. Less of me...more of others...more of Him.

A sweet story about a police officer tomorrow night...after I'm home...OK.

Happy Sunday...

Tampa News

I'm not sure how the weather was on the ground between Nashville and Tampa today, but at 30,000 feet it was positively magnificent! Lavish blue skies and puffy, marshmallow clouds all the way.

And there was no one in the seat next to me, so I got to have my litlle bubble of space uninterupted. That's always nice.

Weather on the ground in Tampa was a balmy 93 degrees and sinfully breezy.

But enough about the magnificent weather...

Andy. Wow. I am so glad to be here to see him again. He looks so very different that he did the last time I saw him. His facial wounds have cleared, he's been clean-shaven with regularity, and there's a noticable lack of cords and wires and tubes. He's still on the lightweigh soft foods diet...his drink of choice being Sunny D. :)

The down-side is that he's lost a significant amount of weight--dropping from 185 to 145 in less than 6 weeks. He was covered up with a quilt when I first went into his room and I swear he looked about 12. Thankfully, Daniel had warned me.

Andy's new routine here includes a-l-o-t of work--something he wanted. Speech, PT, OT, and several other "T"s...

FLY

New Stampin' Up catalog...check
Blackberry...check
Camera...check
Laptop...check
GPS...check
A cord and charger for each of the above...check
Mail for Andy...check
Map...check
Ticket...check
Water....check
Gum...check

Oh yeah...a few clothes and a toothbrush...check.

If I didn't have to carry all this technolog...I think I could have packed in a much smaller bag.

Embossing with the Revolution

Using Cuddlebug (brand) embossing folders with the Quickutz Revolution...yes, you can!

Read carefully.

ONLY use the embossing folders in conjunction with the gridded sticky mat. See the photo. The sticky mat set is 2 pieces. Use the thinnest piece (the one with the grid that is actually sticky) with the Cuddlebug embossing folders.

The sticky mat set is designed to be used with the Cookie Cutter alphas and comes with each set of CC alphas or can be purchased separately here or at your local QK retailer.

Finally, you can see a video of this being done by the Scrap-Mart Live lady here. It's a project video...and the embossing is done towards the end.

If you are embossing on a Revolution that has the extended platform (not the original), you can use more than one gridded sticky mat at the time (lay them end to end) to get the full coverage of the embossing folder. Also, if you add an extra layer of cardstock on top of the gridded sticky mat, the embossed impressions will come thru deeper and more detailed.

I love the Cuddlebug embossing folders...they are inexpensive and give such fab textures. Enjoy!

EDIT TO ADD: To acheive the same result with your Revolution and the expanded platform, use the sticky mat for the extension platform. This will allow you to utilize the entire length of the embossing folder. You can see that at the Memories in Bloom blog here.

The New Battle

From Daddy on Monday...with a slight edit.

Hello faithful family,

Well here is the long awaited address for Andy's new place in Florida--

James A. Haley Veterans Hospital
13000 Bruce B. Downs Blvd
Tampa Florida, 33612,
(skip two spaces here and put ...)
SCI-D21-2
James Andrew Burnett.

The whole thing goes in the center of the envelope as usual.

I had a long conversation with Daniel tonight and the gist is that Andy is doing what he is suppose to do with all of his therapist and he is eating, but he is also struggling with his reality. I'm sure we all knew these days of hard reality were coming.

Daniel's prescription seems to be a good one. He said, "Dad, we just have to get through it."

I think there is nothing else to say. Sometimes you just have to hurt and push on. Thank God for Daniel's wisdom and patience. He seems to know just what to do and be for Andy. But, at the end, this is Andy's battle, and he just needs time and space to fight it.

I would only ask that you to continue to pray hard. It is the only means by which we can really help him. In the place where Andy is now, I truly believe that only God's hand can lift him.

I (We) will never forget your faithfulness in these days.
Love,
Larry for Donna and our family

From Sarah:
If you've been reading here very long, you've probably noticed that I try to keep the news of Andy succinct and as positive as it can be, given the gravity of the situation, while keeping it honest. I know it's hard to read at times. It's also hard to live, even from this distance. (I continually vascillate between believing that the distance is a blessing or a curse.) Nonetheless, it is always my goal to convey 3 facets in each revealing post about Andrew:

1) the facts of the situation, especially so that believers can pray specifically for his needs

2) the faith with which we face this reality--not to show it off for our glory but to reinforce our faith and belief in the author and creator of all of us. We do not stand by our own strength and at no time in the past or present has that ever been more clear to any of us.

3) the universal nature of the experience--because while this particular story belongs to Andy mainly, and the rest of us secondarily, it is also being played out to varying degrees in the lives of many other soldiers and their families too. This thought can be simultaneously comforting and grievous.

Some of you have only come to know Andy in the past month by whatever information and experiences you have collected through his story here. Know that we are deeply grateful for your concern, your prayers and your thoughts and that sharing his stories with you is healing for us. The power of virtual strangers expressing generous compassion and concern is amazing.

Daddy wrote today of the seeming beginning of the hardest part of this battle-- the part that only Andy can fight. There is no positive way to say it...except to say that I am positive that this is the fight of his life. That's just the bare fact. As the medications clear from his head and the hard blows of reality is no longer clouded, Andy--more than any of the rest of us--bears the full weight of how deeply his life has been altered.

The time has come to soldier on.
So that is what we do.
We claim a certain healthy amount of tunnel vision and we find just one day's worth of grace and power from God our Father--just enough. We are not thinking of tomorrow...just today. Not saying that's the long term plan--just the plan for now.

Soldier on.

While Andy has a choice to make in how he responds to all that life has brought to him, and we pray often for him to have the strength of mind and soul to make all the right choices in this fight--the rest of us really don't have a choice for ourselves. Mom and Dad, Daniel, Deborah and I--I think it's safe to say that none of us even consider that we have a choice in this matter. Andy is ours. Our brother and son. We will soldier on right beside him, physically and metaphorically carrying him when need be, for as long as it takes.

Giving up is not an option.
Backing down is not an option.
Failure is not an option.

Andy's path in life is perhaps bumpier in the short-term, but it is as straight as it has always been. Surprising--yes. Unexpected hills and valleys--certainly. Dark at times--absolutely.

I don't believe in that "Army of One" theme--not for a single moment. I think it's totally bogus. I know that there are literally thousands of people in Andy's Army now...it started with 5...and it grows exponentially with each passing day.

Thank you for that.



Several readers have emailed questions about all sorts of topics related to my family, Andy, how the Army works in this situation and such...if you have questions, don't be shy. I have started answering them in a catch-all post that I would like to finish by Wednesday. So now is the time, if you have a burning question that's sticking to your brain like gum on your shoe... let me hear from you.

Soldier on.

Life's Not Fair...suck it up and deal.

One thing I learned pretty quickly after becoming a parent is that if you want to see yourself in an honest, unpolished light, look closely at your children. Little mirrors, they are. And sometimes, the news isn't pretty.

My sons are 12 and 5 and, as all children do, have been known to get pretty wrapped up in themselves. Gee, I wonder where they learned that from? They seem to operate under the misguided universal notion that life should be fair and equal. Am I raising some little socialists? No, no, no.

"He got more macaroni than I did..."

"He has more markers than I do..."

"Why does he get to go with Daddy to the gas station and I don't? It's not fair..."

It's that inborn "me first and foremost" attitude that drives me up the wall--in them and in myself. How many times this week have I heard myself say "He's your brother. Don't be self-centered"? Too many. How many times have I said "Lord, why...?" thinking I had a better plan than the author of the big picture or that I had somehow been deprived of something that someone else had or had access to?

Silly, silly children we can all be.

One of the things I want my sons to learn how to do is to put other people before themselves--without being asked and without expectation of return favors. Those are tall orders, I know. Tall but attainable. I especially want them to do this for each other, as brothers.

As an adult, I have already figured out that life does not have a fairness meter. If we spend all our time bemoning the lack of perceived "fairness", life will pass us right by.

On a practical level, it's not particularly fair that the more you exercise for your health, the more you have to exercise. If life were fair, exercise would work in reverse. The more you did, the less you would have to do.

If life were fair, drunk drivers would be the ones injured in their car crashes. Most of the time, it's the drunk driver who doesn't get hurt. Why is that?

If life were fair, dedicated soldiers wouldn't get shot by snipers.

If life were fair, babies wouldn't be born with birth defects and painful complications.

While I don't want to be the kind of mother who rips every shred of that innocent world view from my children prematurely, I do think that the earlier they begin to understand that not everything in life feels universally fair, the better equipped they will be to deal with life as mature adults. A week or two ago I heard a snippet of a conversation on tv where the one character said to the other something along the lines of:

"There's a bunch of planets and moons and stars floating around in space. They are all aligned with the one big ball, which is the anchor of the universe. That big ball, the anchor of the universe around which all things rotate...well, it's not you."

I couldn't help but laugh. I think that should go on a t-shirt. :)

I want to teach my children that they are cared for in a way that is most uniquely appropriate for each of them as individuals, by Joal and I, and by the heavenly Father too. God the Creator knows exactly what we need and gives to us accordingly in grace and with great love--not according to what our neighbor of friend or brother has or needs--but exactly and specifically what we need individually, according to his design. How reassuring that is.

Part of learning that life is not fair and that the universal lack of fairness is OK means also accepting that Christians are called to have hearts constantly filled with gratitude. Asking myself "Am I operating from a grateful heart?" is one of the finest ways I know to quickly and succinctly check myself. Is my current action reflective of my heart's gratitude for the presence and wisdom of the Lord in my life? When it's not, the misalignment of my life becomes glaringly obvious. Fast.

~~James 3:17~~ ((The Message))
"Real wisdom, God's wisdom, begins with a holy life and is characterized by getting along with others. It is gentle and reasonable, overflowing with mercy and blessings, not hot one day and cold the next, not two-faced. You can develop a healthy, robust community that lives right with God and enjoy its results only if you do the hard work of getting along with each other, treating each other with dignity and honor. "

May it be so today.

"No, you don't get as much macaroni as your brother because he's 7 years older than you, weighs 50 pounds more than you and he needs more to eat than you do. Your needs are met--you are not starving. Stop whining and eat."

"That's because he has taken care of his markers, so he still has the full set that he got at Christmas. Look around and see if you can find the ones you have misplaced."

"It's his turn to go with Daddy to the gas station. You went yesterday, remember?"

Life is not fair.
But God is good.
For that I am grateful.

Happy Monday!


PS I really like what Jane Johnson Struck had to say about this topic too...

Is that a completed page I see?? Nooooo, surely not.

A completed cruise book page...no way.
Way.

Sorry for the little face smudges...don't want to post people without their permission.

Progress...nice.

From Dad on Saturday

Hello to Andy's extended family,

Sorry to be a little inconsistent with updates the last few days. I'm finding it more difficult, not being at the scene. I don't want to overload him, but I hope to be able to turn these updates over to Daniel soon so that your info does comes directly from the scene. However, Dan's wireless capable lap top is still in route to Florida. That makes it much more difficult for him to take care of this right now. So, I guess Dad is still the guy, along with Sarah and her wonderful blog, and our great son-in-law, Joal, with his occasional messages.

So, here we go. It seems the boys are just in the "take it all in" mode right now. Andy is just working through a kind of orientation at the hospital and the first week stuff is going on. Daniel said the transition had been fairly painless for both of them as far as the orientation goes.
Andy is still dealing with pain in his shoulder but the doctor's are very focused on that now. They have given him a cortisone (I think) shot to help but it takes 24 hours to kick in. However this should give him some relief.

He will have a regular daily routine within a few days. His work will involve from 2 to 6 hours a day. He continues to laugh and talk and cut up a bit with the staff there. Daniel also speaks, as you would expect, of some low times too.

My feeling is that we have kind of settled in for the "long haul." I can only somewhat estimate Andy's emotional ups and downs from this distance, and Donna and I both are really uncomfortable with that, even though we know that for now it is necessary and best. Andy's heart is the issue that is really never very far from our minds, and I know all of you share in that concern. But, for now at least, it seems to be mostly about just breathing in and breathing out, and putting one foot in front of another to get to a better place.

That place is coming because God's in the deal.

Love to all. Larry, Donna and family.

Stampin' Up

I had the pleasure of attending my neighbor's Stampin' Up New Catalog Release Party last night...what a blast! There were about 20 people there (maybe more) and she had six stations set up--each with a different project. It was nice not to have to think too much about what to do--just stamp and assemble. The new catalog is fabulous...so many things to love. I had such a great time!

The card above is made using the new colors from Stampin' Up! Aren't they pretty and seaside-ish. The bracket frame is a set that comes with 4 stamps (all that shape) and (get this) a punch that is perfectly matched for use with the set. How cool is that? (Cool enough that I ordered it...)




One can never go wrong with pink and red and brown and glitter right!



This is the mini-project...it's just large enough that when you raise the flap, there's a pocket for a mini-chocolate bar or other treat. With just a slight adjustment, this could also be the perfect holder for a gift card. (Sorry, I forgot to take a picture of the inside.)

And finally, in Andy news, a few days ago my father wrote about Andy's hair. I found this photo a while back and thought some of you might get a kick out of it. It was after his first haircut, which tamed his flaming curls just a little. A little. Not much. As you can see. :) That's Andy on the right, lookin' all devious and cute in his cammo at Christmas.



Happy Saturday!

PS I'm aware that my blog banner is goofed up right now. Sorry about that. I dumped a bunch of stuff off my website and accidentally deleted it. I'll get it fixed in a while.

Leavin' on a Jet Plane

Hear me humming... :)

I'm flying down to Tampa on Thursday to see Andy and Daniel!
One week...gotta hang on for one week.
You know they have beaches in Tampa.
Hee hee...oh wait. Did I say Thursday? I might tell Daniel
I'll be there on Friday. Would that be so wrong?

Yeah, ok.
Probably not a good idea to lie to my brother.
But we are talking about the beach.
The beach...only like my favorite place on earth!

Tampa...even tho my beloved in-laws dangled their possible move to Tampa in front of my beach-deprived heart and then snatched it away like a bad joke a few months ago...(not that I haven't forgiven them or accepted that God had other plans for them...), I may still end up with my toes in the Tampa sand this season anyway.

Shouldn't play with a girl's heart like that... grumble grumble... :)

Not that it's all about me or anything.
I just get a little caught up when there's a stretch of soft sand and blue water within--oh, say 200 miles of my feet. I get a little nuts.

I know you're probably thinking I'm a little nuts already.
And I'm OK with that.

Fay better get out of the way.

Opps. Did I mention I'm going to Tampa to see my brothers?
:)
Happy Friday to you!




PS For what it's worth, my in-laws are, in fact, moving to the great state of Maine in September, where, I've been told, there are some fabulous beaches as well...so there's hope for getting over the loss of Tampa yet. :)

From Daddy on Thursday

Hello Andy's Family,
Donna and I took off a couple of days after Sunday. Our minds and hearts wanted to keep going, but our bodies wouldn't cooperate. But we are kind of back now, and I thought I would let you know what I know from Daniel as of about 10:00 last night.

Dan said that they had a pretty good trip to Florida on the C-130 aircraft. It wasn't crowded and he got a nap on the way. Andy rested pretty comfortably. Dan said it was kind of an "Air Force Sky Taxi." They let several people off at different places along the way.

Andy and Daniel arrived at the hospital after the normal business hours, but Dan said that everybody was very accommodating. They settled Andy in and began attending to the pain that had started up in his shoulder again by the end of the long day.

Dan said his quarters at the Fisher House were about 100 feet from the back door of the hospital. He said his room was extremely nice and that there were all of the extra facilities for an easy stay including washers, dryers, and a nice kitchen with a private cabinet for each guest where they could put their own grocery items.

So, it seem that everyone has entered a new phase, so to speak. Donna and I are starting to consider how best to play a role in Florida to help Mr. Independent (Daniel) who always seems comfortable with whatever he has to do. I wish I had half of that kids confidence.

For Donna and I, the details that used to seem so important around here, don't really seem so any more. Caring for Mother is important. Our ministry work is important. And a few people issues certainly matter. But the rest, not so much. We're still drifting a little bit, like we are not really supposed to be here. But we know we are, at least for a time.

Since this all happened my mind has regularly gone back to times when Andy was small. I guess it is kind of an escape mechanism. That has gone on a lot since we have been home too. It brings a great deal of comfort to me to think about his childhood.

I remember one time when we lived in Jackson MS. Andy would have been about 3 or 4. In those days, I was taking some classes and building furniture to make ends meet. Every day, in the morning, I would go out to my shop to start in and my little shadow would follow me.

Little boys typically have a lot of questions along about that age. Not Andy. He had all the answers. And he was not afraid to share this vast wealth of insight with anyone who could keep up. I used to think, "So many answers, such a small head." Anyway, that was exactly what he was doing with me on this one particular morning.

He started to play on the rope swing just outside the doors of my shop as I went to work. So, for a couple of hours, I worked and he "rattled." Then, I noticed that it got quiet. There was only one thing more scary than listening to Andy, and that was when you listened and couldn't hear him. At that point you instantly knew, "something's up."

So, that morning I went to investigate. What I saw is still clearly etched in my brain to this day. Just outside the shop sat an old rusty, deep sided wheel barrow. Andy had gone in and gotten the the big fluffy white pillow off his bed and put it in that wheel barrow and then crawled in himself and went to sleep.

So, there he was, sound asleep in the wheel barrow. That in itself was quite a picture, (which I did snap with our camera that morning). But unless you knew Andy in those days, you don't yet have the whole picture.

At this age, except for his searing intellect, Andy's hair was, without doubt, his most striking feature. Actually, in those days, he was mostly hair. He had little reddish blond tufts all over his head. They were thick and shiny and just long enough lay over in little soft loops. It was quite a "do" and we just didn't have the heart to cut it.

When he walked, every little tuft bounced lightly on his head. People couldn't keep from touching it. And more than one lady said they would kill for hair like that. Andy, of course, was oblivious. But, the rest of us loved it, and we've got lots of "pics" to prove it. So, when I looked at Andy in the wheel barrow, the picture I saw was about 1/3 pillow, 1/3 boy, and 1/3 hair. He looked like "Cousin It" (The Adams Family) with a permanent. As long as I live I will never forget that picture.

I am very proud of who Andy is today, and who he is going to be, as I am all of my children. But I so treasure the memories of their childhoods, especially today. I think there is nothing so beautiful in this life as innocence.

I hope we can all retain something of ours. I hope our children can. I hope our world can. I have found that, that is one of the things that Christ has restored to me as I have followed him. He has taken away much of the "destructive sophistication" of life, just as He promised to do, so that I can enjoy the innocence that comes from being less "aware."

When you can entrust such issues as tomorrow, and personal survival, and life's randomness to Him, life is simpler and I don't have to be so sophisticated in all that I am about. I will take innocence over sophistication any day.

We love you all, and we are so grateful for your love. My God grant you the "light burden" of his watchcare this day.

Larry and Donna for the family.

One Month Ago

Written on August 17--

One month ago today, on an oddly cool Thursday in Middle Tennessee, I turned off my phone for one hour during a meeting with Julian's psychiatrist. I almost never turn off my phone...but on this day I did.

When I got in the car, at about 9:55, I turned it back on and saw that my brother, Daniel, had called and I had a message. Daniel doesn't call me very often--usually it's when he's talked to Andy and has news. With Andy's leave approaching in a few weeks, I thought maybe Daniel had the date of Andy's arrival to share. As I called my voicemail to retrieve the message, I was thinking of plane tickets and how I was looking forward to being there at the airport when Andy arrived home this time. I chose to miss his last arrival party at the airport in Dallas...and I have regretted that ever since. I met him in Texarkana at my parents...and while it was sweet, I wished that I had made the larger effort to be at the airport. I had already warned Daniel that I would definitely be at the airport for the next homecoming.

And then I heard Daniel's voice say "Sarah, this is Daniel". In four little words, I knew something was very wrong. He continued. "I had a phone call about 20 minutes ago and Andy's been wounded".

I've never actually been punched in the stomach but I suspect that's probably what it feels like. I couldn't breathe. Time just seemed to stop and my heart started hurting that day in a way I have never known before.

I was driving down Hillsboro Road, thinking I should really pull over but knowing I neeeeded to get home. Daniel's deep gravelly voice relayed as many details as he had been given but I could hear him struggling to relay the information. To his credit, he got through the message and even had the forethought to go on and call my husband. Providentially, Joal was in town that day, working close by and he answered when Daniel called. I use the word "providentially" because all three of those details--him being in town, working close by, and in reach of his phone when Daniel called--are all three small miracles. If this had happened on any of the 5 Thursdays before, Joal would have been anywhere from 4 hours to 4 states away.

Joal knows me well and he knew that I would call him first. When I did, his first words to me were "Daniel's already called me and I'm on my way".

We talked for a few minutes, although I don't remember about what exactly. His love calms me in amazing ways and then I knew I could call Daniel back. I did pull off the road for a few minutes to do that. I'm pretty sure my boys were scared quiet in the back seat. When we stopped Grey got out of his chair, crawled up to the front of the Jeep, put his hand on my face and said "Mommy, do you need a Diet Coke?" I did...in a bad way, in fact, but more than that, I needed to get home to Joal.

I explained to the boys that Uncle Andy had been hurt in Afghanistan and we needed to pray for him and then we needed to get home. We prayed together and I drove us home. Grey's prayers always amaze me. Anytime Grey asks God for something, instead of saying "Lord, please" or "God, we ask that you..." Grey says "Jesus, be sure to...". In this case it was "Jesus, be sure to take care of Uncle Andy in the Army. Be sure he's not too scared."

We met Joal at home a few minutes later. Joal and I have been married for 16 years. I've found comfort in his arms so many times. He rights my world. And so it was this day...we spent the rest of the day together, on the phone, on the computer, praying, waiting for information.

I don't remember much else about that day. It's pretty much a blur. I just know that everything changed that day. Life became harder and messier and sweeter. Jesus became more real to me.

Back in the spring, I read of a woman named Angie Smith who received the news that the daughter she was carrying was facing being born with many birth defects and that her daughter would not survive. Upon receiving this heart-breaking news, she began to say "My Jesus is still the same." This became somewhat of a theme that carried her thru the weeks and months that were so difficult--so filled with heart break and mourning. No matter what life brings, my Jesus is still the same.

God the Father wrapped those words around my heart on Thursday, July 17, 2008. I didn't know that day what the future would hold. To be honest, I was pretty scared of the future that day, but I did know that the God who created Andy to be the power-lovin', thrill-seekin', parachute-jumpin', never-say-die, big-hearted Army medic is the same God who will not be defined by whether or not Andy's legs work right or not. In the face of Russian-made bullets, damaged bodies and hurting spirits, My Jesus is still the same.

I rest in that today and every day.

My brother was a hero long before that sniper found his mark and he will continue to be long after this part of his story becomes just another chapter.

Wheels Up

Message from Mom this morning said the boys (Andy and Daniel) are wheels up for Tampa. Who Hoo!! The transport plane they are on (Air Force) has several stops to make so it will probably take all day to get there.

No jumping, Andy. :)

Birthday Funny.

So, if I had posessed two brain cells I would have thought to stop and take a picture...but I didn't so you'll just have to read all about it.

A few days ago Julian and I were down in Cool Springs doing a little shopping. As we drove past the world-famous Financial Peace Plaza, on Mallory Lane (hi dave) --on the next corner I noticed a banner that said "Call ___ and wish him a Happy Birthday 000-0000". (I can't remember the name of the person...Richard maybe.) For non-locals, Mallory Lane is one of the busiest streets in the community...tons of business offices and retail establishments. It's always busy.

I'm sorry. I thinks that's about the craziest funniest birthday prank in the history of modern birthday gags! The banner was huge and in a very visible location...I wouldn't be surprised if a gazillion people called to wish him a happy birthday!

I bet it was the best birthday and the busiest...ever!

Andy on Tuesday

Daniel called this morning to say that Andy rested well last night, with only some minor pain in his shoulder. Their trip has been delayed by some residual paperwork and the arrival of Hurricane Fay in Tampa. Hopefully by Wednesday they will be back on the move.

Bless you all,

Music

Joal's first single "dropped" this morning on MySpace.
Check it out.

((Turn it up!))

Pictures

Be Strong
By Maltbie D. Babcock

"Finally, my brethren, be strong in the Lord, and in the power of His might."~ Ephesians 6:10

~Be strong!
We are not here to play, to dream, to drift,
We have hard work to do, and loads to lift.
Shun not the struggle; face it.
'Tis God's gift.

Be strong!
Say not the days are evil, - Who's to blame?
And fold not the hands and acquiesce, - O shame!
Stand up, speak out, and bravely, in God's name.
Be strong!

It matters not how deep entrenched the wrong,
How hard the battle goes, the day, how long.
Faint not, fight on!
To-morrow comes the song.

Amen.








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Sea and Sunshine

I've been sitting on my hands to keep this quiet until it became official...and finally it is! Joal has earned a new diamond in his ring and secured our place on the 2009 NWYC cruise!

Way to go, babe!

Anticipation

In anticipation of Andy's move from Walter Reed to Tampa--which should happen in the next few days--Mom and Dad are returning to Arkansas today. Pray for their safe and comfortable travels and for them to be fully able to rest and find peace with this separation from what has been complete focus for weeks now.

Happy Saturday...and can I just say "GO DARA!!"